October 2009

After restarting three times, I finally managed to officially start my non-cursing month. Which has ended today, the 12th of October. It’s the day before my birthday, which I see as a sign! (Don’t know what kind of sign, but I’ll think about that later ;)) The whole hypothesis behind this goal was that at the end of the month, my speech would’ve been really improved, decent and just better. I don’t know right now if that’s true, that’s why I’ll observe myself for the week and then post again about my (hopefully) improved speech.

The first days, or well let’s just say the first week I hated this goal. I hated it with all my heart; I had to look out so carefully about what I was saying, just thinking about every single word… I couldn’t just blurt something out anything that came into my mind. And that’s very exhausting, because it’s so much easier for a person to learn to talk in a certain way, then to unlearn it. Or well, it’s not that somebody learned me to curse, but it was something I was used to do. But in the end it became easier and easier, which meand also less exhausting. And luckily I still had the weekends, and if I just stayed home, I would automatically not curse.
For some reason it isn’t hard to nót curse in front of my family, I don’t have to think about my speech at all, it just comes out naturally. Maybe it’s because the subjects of the conversations I talk about with my family are different that the ones I have with my friends. Or now I think about it, there isn’t that much of a difference in subject, hmm then how can it be…? Haha, I guess that’s also a thing for me to observe in this week.
I’m a very, very unpatient girl, like if something weird happens to the computer (like when it doens’t react fast enough), I’d immediately stress and push some buttons and click around and well I just like to do stuff fast. I really don’t like slowcoaches, they can make me so irritated! In the past I could control my patience less than I can now. But now I still flee to curse-words if things don’t happen fast enough for me. I guess that was another side of the goal; to see if I can still control my patience if I don’t have my curse-words. And I must say that I can (or perhaps this was just an uneventful month). I think I’ve only become better in controling my patience these past few years and I’ve past the final ‘test’, which was this month. (And yes, I’ve been my own judge :P)
Well, that was that. Glad I’m finally finished with this goal. But I’m still hoping I won’t turn back to my previous speech, maybe a little, but I just want my speech to be more decent in general!

image: Stefan Valent

xx Michelle


I’m kind of disappointed in myself because I’ve failed. I haven’t used Twitter every week! I thought it was so easy, but apparently it isn’t 😦 I totally forgot about Twitter while I was on vacation and in the busy schoolweeks.
So this is me saying: I failed. I failed, I failed, I failed. And now’, this is me quoting Elizabethtown:
“So you failed. Alright you really failed. You failed. You failed. You failed. You failed. You failed. You failed. You failed. You failed. You failed. You failed. You failed. You failed. You think I care about that? I do understand. You wanna be really great? Then have the courage to fail big and stick around. Make them wonder why you’re still smiling.” – Claire Colburn (played by Kirsten Dunst)

xoxo Saskia

So, I realised my list of goals was a mess. I’m now working on making them doable, measurable or clearly defined, because most of them weren’t. I’m deleting some goals, adding some new, and I hope I’ll be able to post more often when I’ve done all that.
Something different. We’ve been put into the masterlist of Day Zero Project! (we’ve been accepted a long time ago, but that doesn’t matter haha)
Don’t you just love us, hahaha (read the irony here, well, not irony, but hey, I’m not quite serious XD)

xoxo Saskia

Long time no see, again. I’m feeling so bad for not keeping you posted. But here I am with another task I’m working on.

The thing is: I have many bad behaviours and they are horrible. The most important thing is scratching. I need to let it go, but it seems like I can’t. Actually, I am scratching at the moment. But okay, this is one thing, there are more. I shouldn’t snack when I’m just bored and don’t specially feel like eating. Another important one: I need to work on my self-confidence. It’s impossible to explain exactly how I feel sometimes, but I need to stop apologizing for myself. So that’s what I’m going to do.

Maybe I do need the 1001 days to fully complete this one, but I’m going to do my best and I let you know when I succeed. Or fail.

What are your bad behaviours? Are you going to leave them sometime?

x Nina